You Know You're a Parent If...

I have been thinking a lot lately about how different I am now that I am a mother. How we define ourselves informs so much of what we do, how we say things, who we talk to, what is important--but changes in those definitions don't happen overnight. So here are a few ways to know if you're a parent:

a) in the last week, the following thought has crossed your mind: "If I could have one thing in the whole world, it would be an extra-large capacity washer/dryer."
b) you are painfully familiar with the characters in Dora the Explorer--and Diego is just not cool, even though he has an electronic field journal.
c) the smell of play-doh makes you smile--until you have to pick it out of the carpet.
d) you have said one of the following statements to your children: "If you eat all your broccoli, you can have a cookie. But I must see a clean plate." "Keep your hands to yourself." "I do not want to hear you talk to your mother that way." "Buckle up, kids! We're goin' to Kids Night at Applebees!"
e) some part of your car or home (or both) has pen/marker/crayon marks that just will not go away, even with a Magic Eraser.
f) there are components for a scrapbook in your home, but you have no idea when you will compile them.
g) at least once a week (and probably more often), you awaken with tiny feet wedged into the small of your back--and you honestly don't mind.
h) your heart melts with every kiss, hug and "i love you" that you hear from sweet young voices and you want to grab them up and protect them from the yucky things in the world and simply shower them with perfection 24-7.

Is there anybody out there?

Okay, so very few people are leaving any comments about my blog entries. In fact, I think my lovely college friend Shana (who is also a super blogger) and Peter are the only ones who have left comments to date. Either no one is reading them (probably the likely scenario) or, more disturbing, no one wants to respond to them because they are boring. I realize there are no pictures on the blog--and I promise at some point I will make that happen--but really, aren't I witty? Fun? Thought-provoking? Okay, maybe that's going too far. C'mon people, if you're reading, sign up with a blog account (easy and free and does not cause spam) and respond! Go to "sign in" at the top and get yourself an account.

Ten Things You May Not Know About Molly

1. Her memory is impressive. Even when there are no pictures to jog her brain, Molly remembers things we did up to 2 and even 3 years ago. Considering she is only 5, this is remarkable.
2. She knows all the dance moves to Gabriella's solo song in "High School Musical."
3. She does not like to sleep alone. While Rebecca would be perfectly satisfied to have her own bed, Molly wants her to sleep with her on "the big bed" (guest room bed).
4. The girl who once ate everything we offered her will now only eat a few things. At a wedding last night, for example, she ate croutons, strawberries and a roll. No cake. No chicken.
5. Her feet are getting bigger everyday. Literally. Shoes that fit fine yesterday are blister-producing tight today.
6. She loves to wear skirts and dresses but hates tights. This has been a struggle during the cold months.
7. She wants to be an artist when she grows up.
8. She made a list for me last week of "all the things I want to do in Memphis" in terms of lessons and classes. The list included basketball, t-ball, girl scouts, flute lessons, piano lessons, art classes and acting. I think I need to get a job that pays more, and they need to add some days to the week.
9. She is an outstanding big sister, comforting Rebecca when she is sad, teaching her everything she knows, helping her accomplish new tasks, playing games with her.
10. She's hilarious. We were watching "30 Minute Meals with Rachael Ray" on the Food Network recently. Rachael was boiling water. As the bubbles began, Rachael said, "Oh, look at that beautiful boil!" And Molly said, "What's beautiful about water!?"

Mascots, We Adore Thee

It's Easter time, which means the bunny is at the mall. There was a big discussion about what color the bunny would be, fueled by pictures of Easters past in the scrapbooks. Molly's infant pictures involve two separate bunnies, one brown and one white (but interestingly, wearing her costume backwards, so the fluffy pink tail is on her front, even though the head is on correctly). Rebecca's baby picture with the bunny includes a pale green rabbit (?) with a giant pink bow. For the last two years, there were no Easter Bunny pictures because both girls were scared of him. In fact, Molly was terribly frightened, even at age 5 1/2, by anything with a big head. On her Pre-K enrollment form, they asked "what your child is afraid of" and I wrote, "Mascots."

Then we went to Disney World. Before the trip, I sort of threatened them: you WILL like the characters! This is not Six Flags, it's Disney, and these are all the characters you know and love. They are guys and ladies who dress up in costumes because they like to make children happy, I told them. There is nothing to fear. And, indeed, they loved the characters at Disney World, shied away from only King Louie (very large orangutan from the movie Jungle Book) and Mr. Incredible (Rebecca only). The others were a hit!

It seems I have opened a significant can of worms. After one trip to see the mall bunny (who was white with a flowery vest and glasses, for the record), I now find myself explaining on a daily basis why we cannot go back to see him again--every day. "Okay, if we can't go see the bunny, can we go to Chuck-E-Cheese and see Chuck-E? And when is Christmas so we can see Santa?"

For now, however, they'll have to settle with the picture on the refrigerator of the two of them with this year's bespectacled rabbit. And they'll have to help put that one in the 2007 scrapbook and guess next year about the mall bunny's color.

Ten Things You May Not Know About Peter
1. He has freakishly dextrous toes. He can pick up even tiny objects with them (such as buttons). When he straightens up things on the floor, he doesn't even bend over at all. Remember that movie with Daniel Day Lewis called "My Left Foot"?

2. His mind sings all the time. Every so often, he belts out a line from a song (musical or radio) that is in his head. If you ask, he may share the stream-of-consciousness thinking that led to that particular line. It can be disturbing.

3. He is a human jungle-gym/roller coaster for the girls. They slide down his back, climb on his head, allow him to dangle them upside down, swing on his arms.

4. At work, he does not like to be touched. You know, the friendly pat on the arm and such. No. This makes him uncomfortable. It's funny because he's such a touch guy at home, very affectionate and cuddly.

5. He is obsessed with sharks. Loves "Shark Week" on the Discovery Channel.

6. He has insane amounts of worthless trivial knowledge in that brain, a great partner to have in Trivial Pursuit.

7. He taught himself how to play the guitar. Can play pretty much anything after hearing it. He sings Molly & Rebecca to sleep at night with his guitar.

8. His goatee is going gray. He has been known to experiment with Just for Men.

9. One reality show (pretty much the only reality show) he enjoyed last season was "Project Runway" on Bravo channel, the one about fashion designers.

10. He's the best Daddy and Hubby around. We couldn't ask for better!

Stay tuned for Ten Things You May Not Know About Molly...

Take this Home and Sell It!

We are down to the wire. My last day at my job here is June 29, and my first day at my next job ( a part-time one! Yippee!) is just over a week later. The house here in Davenport is not yet on the market, and I am getting super-anxious. For about a year, we have been purging, moving stuff down to my parents' garage in Memphis in spurts, making list after list of "little projects" (which always take more than a little time, even if they're not expensive). The list seems to grow all the time--which is, I think, not the way a list is supposed to work. With kids and dogs under foot, everything takes twice as long. (This, I keep saying, is WHY we are moving back to Memphis, so when we have projects to do, the kids will have cousins and grandparents and aunts and uncles to entertain them at a distant location--and we can return the favor!)

So here we are, April fast approaching. Down to the three-month mark. For those who are not terribly familiar with me, I am generally a pretty laid-back person. Except when something big is about to happen. Uncertainty makes me insane. And I know that what the house looks like is a reflection on me and me alone, no matter how much Peter and I are partners and all that mess. It's all about me and my "ability" (and I use that word loosely) to decorate, organize and clean. So when people are coming over, when there's about to be a birthday party, when we're about to go out of town, when we NEED to put a sign in our front yard, I am NOT an easy person to live with. I see the irrational behavior, but I can't seem to stop it. I nag and nag and get all passive aggressive ( a common Midwestern trait whichI seem to have adopted). My temper is short, I get headaches, I need caffeine & ice cream, and nobody does anything to my satisfaction. So, Peter, girls, co-workers & friends, I apologize now, both in retrospect and in advance. I KNOW I am crabby. I KNOW you aren't doing anything wrong. It's just that, well, uncertainty makes me insane.

All of you who wondered: what will you do if the house sells fast and you still have to be in Davenport--you can relax! I don't think that will be an issue at this point. But you never know--miracles can happen! Maybe someone will come in at the first open house and say: "I have always wanted a freshly painted 'California split-level' house with a new sump pump and arched doorways! And thank goodness the outlet covers are white! We'll buy it at your asking price!" Until that moment, I will be a witch, even though I know it's not right.

Toy of the Week

As you all know, kids go through phases with toys. This week, the girls have discovered/rediscovered a toy from Christmas. (As is often the case when they get lots of stuff all at once, it takes a while for certain things to be truly noticed.) It is the Polar Set from Animal Planet, a collection of arctic-dwelling figures--penguins, polar bears, killer whale, beluga whale, Eskimo, rescue truck, igloo. You'd think with so many to choose from, arguing would be minimized. But no, if Molly has the penguin baby, Rebecca inevitably wants it immediately. The latest way they handle this is to announce, "Mommy, Molly won't share the baby penguin." After a brief pause, I will sigh and say, "Molly, can you please share? ISn't it nice when other people share with you?" Quiet. "Okay, but you say when to switch." This means I now am entrusted with monitoring how long one child plays with the toy and then I say "SWITCH!" It's both a blessing and a curse to have kids who are old enough to play without me all the time!